I am a vivid dreamer and am beginning to wonder what my dreams are all about. Anyone know of a good dream analysis book or website??

Things that suck in no particular order:

1. neighbors mowing on a sunday
2. teen drama
3. fear
4. having a sick loved one and not being able to help him
5. medication interaction
6. jealousy


We have climbed back onto the crap rollercoaster in our house. Oh what a joyous ride......

Now that we are proud owners of a goat and a sheep my take on animals is totally changing. I have always been an animal lover but never understood the healing factor. Our goat is the cutest goat in the world, I feel like he is one of my children. The amazing thing about the goat is his healing power. He has changed my husbands life. J.is in love with the goat, his name is Carrot Top. He is the smallest goat in the barn and so smart. Carrot Top walks perfectly with my daughter, and will talk to us, he loves to run in the field and munch on grass. He was picked on in the previous pen that he resided in and lost a lot of weight and became quite stressed out. When a goats temperature reach 103 he stops eating and drinking. Carrot Top got a fever and we had to take him to the vet. It was quite a ride in the car. He rode in the back of my SUV and talked to J. on the way back to the barn. J. has turned his thoughts to Carrot Top and his well being. What a healer Carrot Top has been. Our goat is a shot of happiness in a very dark and dreary life. Having our whole world turned upside down by an illness has been hard on all of us, but mostly on J., he is the one who has to live with it. Carrot Top will live a long and happy life, no slaughter house for this goat, he is a healer.

Flies have begin to infiltrate our lives at the barn. They are horrible pests. Now that the pigs are in the barn the flies are not as bad. The flies love the pigs. Flies love stinky poo and the pigs produce that in massive amounts.

Since having animals I have talked about poo, castration, and different types of feed way more than I thought I ever would.

Give me the farm life, I love it.

The seizures are better. Things are calmer but still in a whirlwind.

We now own a sheep and a goat. My girls have joined FFA and are so happy. I never thought my kids would be excited about scooping poop and feeding animals but they really do enjoy it. I dont know how I feel about selling the animals at the end of the year. I am going to try and find a farm close that I can let them roam on, or maybe I can hide them in my back yard.

I have many things that are weighing heavy on my heart but cant seem to write them down. Or is it that I wont write them down.

Finally the industry got a clue and dumped the craziest man alive.

http://extratv.warnerbros.com/v2/news/0806/23/headlines/1/text.html

The shaking is back again and J has had a few seizures. Not in the same day but enough to flip me out. I HATE this disease. IT SUCKS! I just want to be able to wake up in the morning and not worry about J. I am paranoid all the time. Waiting for the drama to start up again.

A new seizure medication has been added and it is not helping yet. The worse thing about this new med is that it is the same one that he was on before and had a horrible reaction too. It can cause a Stephens Johnson rash which is the worse rash in the universe. It is as if you have been in a fire and it cause your skin to just fall off. Your immune system decides whether it wants to fight it or not.

We are heading back to the doctors today to discuss all of this crap. I am sick of doctors. I hate going there.


I am at a threat level RED right now.

J woke up on Tuesday night throwing up acid. He has wicked reflux and the medication that he takes for his epilepsy makes it worse. It was so bad that I thought his eyes were bleeding. I called 911 and they came to the house in three minutes. They did their thing and J had a seizure. In the ambulance J told me that they asked him on a scale of 1-10 how bad was the pain. J said it was a 10. One of the paramedics asked if it was really a 10 or maybe just a 6. DUH!!! If it was a 6 J would have said it was a 6 but it was a 10. This really irritated me, if the paramedic didnt want to hear how bad his pain was then he shouldn't have asked.

Living with a cronic illness is very hard and the fact tht some medical personnel dont understand is so very frustrating.

I think I can handle this LJ thing. A bit more opinions and stories of my world will emerge soon.